Blog 1: Personalities Clash

As an ENTJ, I am categorized as a natural born leader. I am driven by identifying challenges and looking for solutions that are beneficial for the long-range success of an organization. I am extrovert and as such, love interacting with people. This appreciation of others, coupled with self-confidence and good communication skills, makes it easy for people to follow me.

What: In February 2006, I was seated as Vice-President of an organization that leads youth leadership retreats in Northeast Florida. The youngest person on the board by at least 10 years, I was elected to this position based on my vast experience within the organization and the leadership skills that other members of the board saw in me. I had been in this role for 1 year and was poised to resume the role of President the following year. However, the President of the board came to me, rather unexpectedly, and presented me with a 3-page list of infractions that he felt I had committed. According to him, my shortcomings included errors in leading specific events, the integrity of my relationships with the youth involved in the organization, and ultimately that he did not feel I was suited to run the organization the following year. His recommendation was that I resign from the board, take a year off to distance myself from the youth and then my future with the organization could be reevaluated.

Needless to say, I was blown away by this confrontation as none of these issues had been brought to my attention in our time on the board. I felt like this was a personal attack fueled by jealousy rather than a valid presentation of concern for the future of the board. As someone who had previously worked in the corporate world, he did not appreciate the fact that other members of the board, and the community as a whole, would look to me for leadership before him. Additionally, if I resigned, he would remain on the board as President for an additional two years.

I listened relatively quietly in an effort to resist being defensive. I tried simply to listen openly and honestly. I wanted to act on what he said, rather than react to it. After meeting individually with other members of the board, evaluating their responses and formulating my own, I responded to him in a letter that addressed some of the issues he presented and informed him that I would not be resigning from my position.

After that our relationship actually flourished and he showed a greater level of respect for me. He was the one who nominated me for President when the elections took place at the end of the year.

So What: As I reflected on the situation at the time I recognized that our differences stemmed from the fact that we were different types of leaders however I didn’t have the knowledge to articulate those differences. I reviewed the 16 personality types and would categorize him as ESTP. He tended to focus on the items that needed resolution in the present rather than the future. Additionally, he did not follow the rules of order and procedure within the board; rather he would venture off on his own agenda.

When comparing our two personality styles, there were stark differences in the way we process information and ultimately the way that we lead. Neither of us was right or wrong, our downfall was that we misunderstood of each other.

Now What: I am sure that I will encounter similar situations in the future as most everyone has a different personality type. The key is to recognize the different strengths of each type and embrace them as well as empower them to lead in their strengths.

If I were to have the opportunity to go back and redo this situation, I would definitely do some things differently. Throughout our shared time on the board I recognized some of our differences and tried to work around them rather than confronting him directly and trying to work WITH him. Given the opportunity again, I would rather meet with him individually and discuss how we could work together to be an effective team.

With the knowledge of the personality types I feel more grounded in my own leadership qualities and more empowered to identify strengths in others and to encourage them to use them more effectively.